From the article: Second Time Around Shower
Baby showers supposedly are meant to shower the mother-to-be with gifts before the birth of her first baby, at least traditionally. Now there are lots of ways to celebrate a baby, including having second baby showers. Where do you stand on the matter? Would you have a baby shower for a second (or more) baby? Would you do something different to support and celebrate the mother? Is it rude or greedy to have a second baby shower? Share Your Opinion
Third baby but a new one for our family
- Have any of you thought about when a mother of two boys gets divorced and remarried after a few years to a man that hasn't had any children of his own? Now she's expecting a little girl and this will be his first time being a daddy "parent". He's on cloud nine! It has been nine years since the second boy was born and they don't have any baby items. My sons family is so happy for him and his wife. Friends & Family are asking if we're going to have a "Sprinkle" for them. We think it's a great idea ! My son is very proud of becoming a first time dad. Why should he not experience the joy of fatherhood and gifts from people that want to give. We have invited family members and new friends. All our family members and their friends are telling us to have this Sprinkle. After all it is thier first together. We must have great friends and family who care about them. It's kind of funny how people are asking if they can come and these are people that came to the first baby shower.
- —Guest Loving Grammy
Glad I have good friends
- I am expecting my second now and will have a shower, as its been 8 years since I was last expecting. In that time, her crib, car seat, stroller, swing, and baby bottles have all been recalled for safety hazards! My friends, family, and church members had a shower for me with my first. Some people gave me large gifts like a stroller and car seat, others brought small gifts like a pack of pacifiers or a single onesie. Everything, big or small, store bought or homemade, helped so much. The outpouring of love from everyone for my unborn child was the greatest gift though. Every time I would read her a story or wrap her in a blanket or put her in a cute outfit, I thought of the thoughtfulness that was behind it if it was a gift from someone who cared enough to bring it to her shower and eat some cake with me!
- —Guest Second Timer
second baby shower
- I think the only time a second baby shower should be considered is if it has been many years since any previous children - when someone no longer has any baby items - if perhaps they were not planning on having another. A shower is to help someone starting out as a mom. Many times other mom's in attendance have wonderful advise for the first-time mom which is one of the best things about having a shower. I have three kids (two of which are teenagers) and not one of them has ever asked about my baby shower. And yes, I only had one to help us get started as the are intended. You don't see people who stay married for many years having additional wedding showers. I've been married 25 years and have joked about wanting another bridal shower to replace my stuff. No one would ever do that. So why is it ok for baby showers?! I just think it is in poor taste.
- —Guest Scarlet
Mary
- I thinks is so beautiful to celebrate each baby. If you LOVE the person whos having the baby, it comes so natural to want to give them a gift for their blessing and come and celebrate the joy of life...because is life is a GIFT...no baby is more important than the other...I am in favor of celebrating a Baby Shower for each baby. Celebrating life and the joys of our loved ones is the best and what life is all about...sharing and caring. Whomever thinks its rude to have a baby shower for a second baby...is only a reflection of who you are...not the person having the party. Celebrate Life!! a gift is a token.
- —Guest Mary
a getting back your stuff shower
- I'm starting to feel real bad about a 2nd shower with all these bitchy comments. But I'm mostly just asking for MY stuff back. Cribs from cousins, swings from besties. And to play some games and eat some cake while we're at it. Man some of you are meeeeeane
- —Guest sara
Not 1950
- I feel sorry for all of you close minded people. It is perfectly acceptable to have a 2nd baby shower. If the children are close in age, have a diaper party and do a raffle if your really concerned about it. It's called a baby shower, not a mother shower. It is about celebrating a new life. I'm pregnant with my second and there's no way my friends or family would let me go without a shower for this baby as well. Why is this child less important than my 1st? Isn't he or she going to want to see pictures of their baby shower too? This isn't 1950. I will need all kinds of things including a double stroller since my 1st is only 20 months old. Don't let any of the old farts on here discourage you from celebrating your gift from God.
- —Guest Shawna
Yes, you are greedy. Period.
- "And, so what if the mother does want another baby shower for the gifts. Each gift is one less thing the parents have to buy. the economy sucks." yes the economy sucks, which is why you should be able to afford a child - with contigency funds as well - before you have one. If you have a shower for gifts, you are greedy, period. If you want a 'life celebration', have one. But don't call it a 'shower' when you are fully aware that the whole point is to be showered with gifts for prep for motherhood. It sickens me how so many people have kids and then expect others to contribute to taking care of them. If it's the life, it's the life and you say that's what it is - don't use that as a BS excuse to get free stuff.
- —Guest Connie
host another one....
- My sister informed me she wants to have another shower. I don't know if she is implying I should throw it again like I did the first one, but that's the impression I'm getting. This is her second kid and hosting the first cost around 150 all in all. She also got married last year and had her first baby the year before that. Between baby showers, birthdays, bridal shower, bachelorette party, wedding, and now second baby shower...I sure could use a little financial break from her life decisions. She said they git rid of most their baby stuff...its only been a few years and she knew shed have more. I don't want to throw another shower, I'm feeling obligated. I would like to celebrate with her and support her just not financially! I want to go on a trip this year instead! Does this make me the greedy one? At what point does someone else's life choices trump our own? And does that mean that we ourselves are selfish for with holding a gift from a baby not yet here? There is birthdays
- —Guest jess
Seriously?
- Ok, so let me get this what happens to the mothers of preemies who go into labor 7 weeks early and the day before their shower? We just don't get to experience the feeling of friends and family celebrating with us? I feel for the women who never got a shower! Let alone just a BBQ! I was told that since I am now pregnant with my 2 bs child I do not deserve a baby shower! I was on strict bed rest with a cervical cerclage until 33 wks when I went into labor a day before my shower!! So I never got to see friends and my daughter was in nicu for 21 days. So please keep tradition in min as well as in the past in some circumstances! I'm not being greedy I just want to know what's its like to be celebrated as a new mom and maybe just baby after 4 pregnancies 2 of which my children's died and one I never got wheeled out in a wheel chair to my car with balloons and the feeling of relief!
- —Guest Dena
baby showers....and how many more??
- I have nieces who seem to have kids because "it's the thing to do"...they usually cannot afford it...and hence let's throw a shower so we can get more stuff ...as we cannot afford to buy it ourselves. This is a struggling economy for everyone, and young parents needs to recognize when "enough is enough"....let's try birth control...perhaps that's a better solution...sorry don't support most of the baby mamas these days.....I had one because that's what I could afford....and even now after 20+ years, he still costs money....but thank god he and his girlfriend have chosen to not get married...and not have kids right away...or as my nieces are doing...have kids...then never get married!!!!
- —Guest MaryJoMoff
Second baby shower
- I think it is totally rude for anyone to have a second baby shower!!!! You don't get a shower for every child you have!!!! It's very selfish in my opinion!!!!! It's ridiculous! People can never be happy enough. Let alone, Thankful for what they have!!! I am currently invited to a 2nd shower, which I will NOT be attending! Why shy away from a tradition of one shower?!? If more people lived a more "traditional" life......this would be a better world!!!!
- —Guest She
If u don't agree then don't attend
- I am a mother of five sons and am now having my first baby girl. This is my husbands first and friends and family are planning on throwing us a shower. My last son was born 11 years ago and I have never had a shower with either of my children. A couple of years ago I attended a shower of a friends and it was not all about gifts we had so much fun just playing games and being with each other. I don't see anything wrong with it and if anyone else does then they do not have to come.
- —Guest Gladys
Absolutely YES
- I don't think its greedy at all to have a baby shower for each of your kids. Actually, I think the people who think that are greedy themselves. How do you explain that to your kid when they get older...? OH, you were the second kid...only first children are celebrated! Come on people get a grip. Every new child is worth celebrating! :)
- —Guest Jacqueline
2nd Baby Shower
- There are simply no rules of Etiquette that aren't broken these days. Respect for proper manners are completely disregarded. It is not proper to have a baby shower given by a close relative. It is also not proper to allow anyone to give you a baby shower for your 2nd. baby. No Exceptions. You either adhere to the rules or you ignore them and do as you wish. This breakdown of respect for social behavior is so sad. I grew up in a time when good manners were the backbone of a gracious beautiful society.
- —Guest Ann
Second time mom
- I've been debating this back and forth because I didn't want to seem rude or greedy for wanting a gathering to celebrate our new addition. We have a beautiful daughter and will be adding a baby boy to the our family. Instead of a shower or sprinkle, we've decided to throw a BBQ. We won't have the time to celebrate with friends after our baby is born because it falls near our daughter's birthday, family events, military training and a whole list of things. lol We've left it up to our friends (7 of which are also expecting their second baby and 1 who is having her first) about whether they bring anything. We just want to have a get together one last time before everything gets crazy again. No one feels obligated to bring anything and we don't care if they do. lol They know that everything is going to get crazy in the next months so we want to get together one last time!!
- —Guest Andrea
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