From the article: Handling Unwanted Advice
When you're pregnant, everyone wants to touch your belly and tell you birth stories. You might think that once the baby comes, it gets easier. Not so much. After your baby is born comes the barrage of unwanted advice. Everything from sleeping, eating and breastfeeding - someone has an answer for you, even if you didn't ask for it. So how do you deal with unwanted advice? Share Your Advice
Dont let them get to you
- You know your body and your baby best. Don't let other people get to you, and just let these advises go unless you truly feel like trying them out and they are absolutely safe to try. Do not stress about making others happy because what's important is your and your baby's well being- physically AND mentally. Confinement period is essentially a time for you to enjoy your babies' company and recuperate- not to endure the torture of strict confinement do's and don'ts. I was driven to postpartum depression having to please the people around me and following the confinement lady's instruction so much to a point that it almost ruined my marriage. just be positive and happy and don't worry so much. if there is one time in your lifetime that it is perfectly ok for you to be selfish (of your baby and yourself) this would be the time.
- —Guest dale
The advice avalanche!
- My little boy was born and the world descended - thankfully in dribs and drabs as I laid down the law in advance - upon my house. Each 'experienced' mother with their own view on the perfect way to deal with newborns that don't sleep a lot. Ranging from sleep with them in your bed (not a fan as this has safety issues) to leaving them to cry themselves back to sleep (absolutely ludicrous as newborns don't have the ability to know when to smile, so they don't just cry for attention). I have always been polite but made sure that I said something like "oh that's lucky that worked for you. Maybe I'll give that a try and see how it goes. Babies are all so different though." clearly I have no intention of trying these things but it defuses the situation whilst pointing out that if I'm not following their advice next time they see me, it's because it just didn't work for MY child. At the end of the day if you don't feel comfortable doing something, chances are it won't feel good for your child!
- —Guest Louis Mum as of 02-09-11
How do you handle unwanted baby advice?
- I had a lot of people who wanted to touch my belly to feel the movement of the baby and then post delivery there were so many people with all those advices... I let my mother in law handle them and just keep smiling.
- —Guest Sanjana
- My husband's sister-in-law has three kids who talk back and don't listen. She always has something to say, so my thing is to just smile and say "Ya okay. Thanks." And walk away.
- —Guest angel
I get it!!!
- What is most frustrating is when moms tell you what you should and shouldn't do because that's what worked for their baby. The truth is, who knows what will and wont work for your baby until he or she is here. I just listen and nod my head and assure them that when my baby gets here, he and I will figure out what works for us and his diverse needs.
- —Guest Holly