Wanted 2nd boy...But NO
- Just found out that I am having a girl. It is my second child, my first one is a boy who is now 4 1/2. I was very sad when tech told me it is a girl (XX), I was very dissapointed. I wanted another boy so bad, that when I found out I teared up. I did not want a girl at all. My husbad did and he was happy, but I can not get it out of my head. My son wanted a baby brother as well, somone he can play with. I feel like I let him down. I am not into pink clothing and bows. I am so used to being around boys and myself being a tom boy all my life, I felt like I just wanted another boy. I looked at chinase calendar and it told me it was a boy. I feel so cheated that I did not get my second boy. Now I have guilt over me feeling like I will love this child less than I do my boy or if it was a boy. I don't know how to cope with this my heart is aching and I just want to curl up and cry. After all said and done I will feel like I am a terreible mother for feeling this way. I am really taking it har
- —Guest Guest
- I was picked on a lot growing up because we were poor. I never had female friends, and still don't to tell the truth, because I could never stand the way most girls acted. I wanted a boy so badly, and at our 17 wk ultrasound today to do the gender scan, she said she is 99% sure its a girl. My heart is broken and I cannot stop crying, because all I can imagine is another little girl growing up sad and unhappy like I did. The baby's legs were crossed and the tech wasn't completely sure, so I am seriously hoping that at our 22 week ultrasound they will tell us that they were wrong. I am almost certain that will not happen, however. I won't be having more children. I am a diabetic and only wanted one because of health risks, and now I have to try to pretend to be happy when I am not, and watch my cruel family treat the child like crap because it is a girl.
- —Guest MomtoBe
Wishing for a girl
- When I was pregnant with both of my boys I felt they were girls. The last pregnancy my husband and I really believed it was a girl and we had a name picked out for her and everything. However at our 32 week ultrasound we were told it was a boy. We had to come up with a boys name quickly. We are still longing for a girl but only want a healthy baby
- —Guest Jandksmummy
6 girls and 1 boy
- Yes, we have 7 children! It's pretty much unheard of these days. Our kids were born in the 80's and early 90's, back when they still were not doing routine ultrasounds. So we never knew the sex of any of ours, and the first 5 children were all girls. Most people think we kept going to get a boy, and I'm sure that is what it looked like, but actually we thought we were done after the 5th girl because we felt 5 was a large enough family. So we were completely surprised by the 6th pregnancy and really surprised when it was a boy (the boy we would have never had). When he was 4 months old we became pregnant again unexpectantly, but thought "oh well, maybe he'll get a little brother", but NO, the poor little guy got another sister, haha. We were never truly disappointed because we have always been of the mindset and faith that God is in charge and knew exactly what would be best for our family. We wouldn't have it any other way!
- —Guest Momof07
Feeling so sad....
- I had a wonderful 3 year old son and my husband and I were hoping for another boy. Even my son said he wanted a brother and not a sister. Well...we found out today that it is a girl. My husband seems fine with it and my son is accepting that he is getting a sister even though he keeps asking where his brother is. But I can't stop crying. I've even thought about what adoption agencies I shoudl start looking at after the baby is born. My husband wants to hear nothing of my sadness and thinks I am "crazy and unreasonable." There is no way he can understand. I just want to stop crying....
- —Guest It Really Does Matter
- I am the mom of 3 wonderful boys. And believe me, I feel so truly blessed. But I am a girly-girl to the hilt, who never had a sister & is not close to my mom. When I found out my 3 (and FINAL) was also a boy, I was heartbroken. Three years later I have moved on, but as my friends get pregnant and have daughters, I grow more & more resentful. I recently heard the news that my good friend, who also has 2 boys is now having a girl. A fiend said to me, "She's getting her girl," and I felt like a hot poker was being jabbed straight into my heart. Why can't I feel happy for her? And when will I EVER get over the heartbreak of never getting to experience that mother/daughter relationship that I have always dreamed of?
- —Guest Hipmomof3boyz
- Just found out yesterday that I'm having a baby girl, I was really depressed though I have a girl and a boy, I would really have wanted a boy and my husband too. I feel bad for not accepting what I have but am only human and have been crying my eyes out, because I don't want to have another child. Just hope she's healthy and we can bond after she's delivered cos right now am not motivated at all.
- —Guest a little dissappointed
Boyfriend not happy
- I am 18 weeks pregnant and just yesterday found out we are expecting a girl ! My boyfriend is a outdoor man that always dreamed on having a boy .... i wanted a boy also but a girl would be just as good. I'm a little worried with him since hes got so depressed and down since yesterday. Hope it all goes away when are little girl is born.
- —Guest Gabby
I still cry thinking about it.
- When I pictured my family in my mind, I always had a little girl. Having a boy was never even on my radar. However,when I became pregnant for the first time I immediately KNEW it was a boy and I was right. I called off from work and cried all day after that ultrasound. My son was the first boy born in my family in 30 years, but I just never bonded with him the way I know I would have with a girl. To make matters worse, my best friend from law school found out she was having a girl and when I told her the sex of my baby her response was "I;m sorry." like I just found out I was ill. I feel like an outcast. Everyone I know has daughters. Everyone I know who is pregnant wants a daughter. I feel so alone and at five years later, I still cry and mourn.
- —Guest Kelly
just know its a boy
- I can't help but look at the scan pic I got today and see a boy. I don't know for sure but it probably is. If it is I will cry again and again. My first child was a boy and was disappointed when I was told, but as i knew for definite I'd have another it didn't bother me as always wanted a boy and a girl. If it is another boy I don't know how I will be. I don't know if I want more children but if it is a boy I want to keep trying til it is a girl. I know it's selfish but I don't want a life unfulfilled without being a mum of a girl
- —Guest sadeyes
- My husband and I just found out we are having a little girl. While we are thrilled that the baby appears healthy I cried and cried after we found out. I felt guilty about being sad. My husband already has a daughter and all of his siblings have girls. I had my heart set on a boy as we do not know that we will have any more. I am grateful that I can have a child and it will likely be healthy. I will also love my little girl more than anything in the world. I think it just takes a little time to go from trucks (which I am VERY comfortable with, to dresses and bows, which I know nothing about!)
- —Guest Guest
He was supposed to be my girl
- We were told at my 20-week ultrasound that we were expecting a little girl. I was so thrilled. I had wanted a little girl and I felt like my dreams were coming true. But then when my baby was born, I said "Give me my baby girl" and they looked between the legs and said it..."It's a boy." Shock is hardly an adequate word for how I felt. Over and over I was told, "Your son is so beautiful". My mind kept screaming, "But I want my baby girl!" It's been six weeks since he was born and these feelings still persist. A friend of mine just had a baby girl yesterday and I am absolutely disgusted at myself for the level of jealousy I feel toward her. My husband doesn't want to hear about it, and why should he...he's just happy to have his boy, because that's what he wanted. I'm afraid to even try for another baby someday for fear of being disappointed again. Recently my midwife screened me for PPD and I scored 21/30 on the Edinburgh scale. I'm hoping that her referral to a PPD counsellor will hel
- —Guest Andrea
- I just wanted to give my support to those of you who are disappointed. There isn't anything wrong with a natural desire to have one or the other...I always wanted girls. I think in my case it stemmed from always wanting a sister (I have two younger brothers, and was sad both times I heard "You have a new baby brother!") My first pregnancy, I didn't want to find out because I knew that if I learned at birth, I couldn't possibly not love the baby in my arms. I now have two girls and am so grateful. I honestly can't imagine not having the daughters I always wanted and it often crosses my mind that although I know I would have loved my sons if I had them, I would still long for a girl, all the time. For the people who say "You should be happy no matter what.." yeah, we know. But it's not a conscious decison to have an innate desire for one or the other. And 99% of these moms DO love their children no matter what, but it doesn't take away the desire to have the gender they have dreamed of.
- —Guest Michelle798
3 Boys of my own nd 2 stepsons
- I'm 22weeks and have 3 boys, I also have 2 stepsons nd a stepdaughter (shes a tomboy), This time around I was hoping that I was gonna be blessed with my girl, but I was told 2 weeks ago that it was a boy! When the tech said its a boy I went numb, no emotion at all. I felt like I had just been punched and left with no air! All the boys were upset because they wanted a baby sister, My heart hurt for them, I felt as if I let them down! Since finding out I am still convinced it's a girl, I stay up googling things nd researching things! I still cry when I see little pink and purple bows! I just don't know what to do!
- —Guest Guess I'm Still Coping! :/
- My response was the same as Deana! We had the ultrasound on my birthday. All along I thought, hoped, PRAYED it was a boy. That's what we both really wanted. When he said it was a girl, my eyes teared up but not from joy. My heart just sank. I feel horrible for feeling this was and hope that now I know I will adjust and bond. I never thought my first would be a boy. In a way I guess I always wanted one of each but didn't mind if that's not the way it worked put if I ended up with two boys!! Ha. She is very healthy and I should be elated with that its just hard not to feel so disappointed when I had the entire nursery and first years of growing up envisioned as a boy. Pink and purple are NOT my thing at all. I can easily get around it but know everyone else will do nothing but buy the pink frills. We are both so glad we found out the sex instead of letting it be a surprise at birth.... That would've been a horrible surprise.
- —Guest ray