My Current Pregnancy
I am almost 8 weeks but started spotting 4 days ago and very mild cramping. Went to ER yesterday but could not confirm miscarriage although BhCG levels were in the low 6 week range. Have to take the wait and see approach and it's driving me crazy.
My Pregnancy Loss
I lost a baby at 20 weeks some years ago. Fetal demise they call it. I did not wait for natural expulsion and went and had a D&C. That was a very hard loss as I had already started collecting baby stuff and planning etc. This time at almost 8 weeks I have still not had severe cramping and Im still only spotting, but the baby measured 6 weeks instead of 8, so Im pretty sure what's coming.
Deciding to Get Pregnant Again
Between this pregnancy and the baby lost at 20 weeks I have had a daughter who is now almost 4. I got nervous around the 18 week point, but all went well. It was not a planned pregnancy but it was a welcome one. For some reason I only get pregnant in Costa Rica. Or at least the 2 out of 4 times Ive been pregnant and had the baby I conceived in CR. The two other times have been here in the states and the BhCG levels are always low. Weird, huh?
- Just know that all is they way it was meant to be. Had I had the baby I lost at 20 weeks life would of been so different. My son started school that year and I was thinking that it was perfect timing to bring a baby in to the house. Well he ended up having severe learning disabilities that took up all my time, and if I had had a baby as well I would not have been able to devote myself to my son who really needed me. It is incredibly hard to see the blessings in disguise, but do what you can to comfort yourself.