Length of labor (not pushing)
Went to hospital 1.5 hours before the birth as thought it was false labour
Length of pushing
Probably one hour
Who was with me
My husband and the midwife
What I would do differently next time
Perhaps perineal massage to avoid tears
What I did to prepare for birth
My 1st was born by emergency caesarean, diagnosed CPD, but now I feel it had to do more with the rigorous active management of labour of first time mums.Thus, I was reading a lot about VBAC. I was rather fearful,of the usual concerns with the baby and the possible rupture, but even more of the pain I had experienced with oxytocin drip and then the failure after all that effort to deliver the baby. I spoke to supportive friends, asked and asked, from my midwife, doctor, etc; some responses put me off, many were encouraging. I was also physically quite active (less so than with the 1st though) - gym and other activities.
How my birth happened
As due date approached, my body was preparing itself by having a 12 hour false labour and then nothing for 5 days. On the due date, another set of irregular contractions, not intensifying, kicked in. I was sure it was another false alarm. I had a busy day, just looking at the clock more frequently. I was also drinking raspberry leaf tea every few hours, without thinking it would make any difference that day but perhaps whenever the real labour starts. By midnight, after about 11h of contractions, I hoped to doze off and that the contractions would go. Since they did not, I started becoming more and more alarmed. My bags, all prepared for a long labour, were packed, and by 2am I felt if I delay any further, I won't be able to sit in the cab. So I told my husband, got the bags and the cab.
The cab ride was difficult to bear, contractions now seemed to come every few minutes but I was able to speak and joke in between. At the hospital, I was told I was 5cm dilated which was a disappointment to me as I imagined 5 more hours of this intensity would wear me off. A midwife-not mine but the one on night duty-very decisively guided me to the pool. The contractions became unbearable and I felt desperate about the length of this, when the midwife said that the baby is well on its way: I had dilated fully in just about half an hour or so!
The pushing phase was awfully painful; but screaming my head off helped(I do wonder if I broke some kind of a record).Feeling the waters break, and hearing the midwife's explanations why is the pain where it was helped to tame my fears. Then suddenly, there was less pain as the baby had moved so much further down; then there was a horrible push, and the head was born--then the body and a huge relief...There he was, funny and limp and at first unable to breathe as something was blocking his nose. But it only took a moment, and it was nearly all behind me...just the placenta, which the midwife was concerned for a moment might be stuck to the CS scar. Thankfully, it was not.
The whole thing from our entry to the hospital to the delivery of the placenta took 2.5h.And the feeling of adequacy, of having not been managed by medical science but simple coping strategies of a good midwife, knowing where my son was right after he was born, how he looked and how he looked at me, are all the building blocks of becoming a truer, better mum than I probably have been with my firstborn who himself is a bit of an "active management" case, as I have tended to prod and push him way too actively
Lessons learned
- Delay going into hospital. I believe had I delayed the first time, I would have been in a better position to avoid the caesarean
- Know what the medical science has on offer but also where it can harm-active management (primarily targeting the first time mothers as their labour is generally much lengthier) is a strategy that may lead to increased chances of CS. If you want to avoid that (and I cannot think of any reason apart from danger to life why anyone would not want to avoid it), avoid the hospital as long as you can
- Births may well be metaphors for life. I hope my newborn will guide us to more natural parenthood.
