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Is it normal to not want sex in pregnancy?

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Updated May 21, 2014

Pregnant woman asleep in bed
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Question: Is it normal to not want sex in pregnancy?
Many women hear that the libido or sex drive of a pregnant woman is increased, this is not always true. It can also lead to some women feeling guilty when they find that they don't really want sex while pregnant. For the vast majority of women, it is safe to have sex in pregnancy. There are a few exceptions to when you shouldn't have sex while pregnant and there are a few women put on pelvic rest.
Answer: It can be perfectly normal to not want sex in pregnancy. Your libido in pregnancy can vary widely, typically this is by trimester. For example in your first trimester, you may worry about your pregnancy or baby. You might have severe fatigue or even experience morning sickness, that make you feel like sex is the last thing on your mind. More women find the second trimester to be an active time for sex, but you may still have concerns or just be accepting your pregnant body as it changes. In the third trimester you may also be tired and feel like your changing body makes it difficult to have sex at the end of pregnancy, though sex is fine up until labor or when your water is broken.

The key to coping with your lack of desire for sex is to talk to your partner about how you are feeling. Ensure them that this is temporary and that you're feeling tired, sick or just blah. Sometimes opening up can give you a chance to find some alternatives to sex. For example, perhaps snuggling or kissing is a good alternative for you and your partner. Maybe you can even trade back rubs or just spend some quality time together. Maybe you want to have sex but avoid orgasms, or skip the sex and have only mutual orgasms. Keep these lines of communication open. Your desire levels for sex in pregnancy can fluctuate as can your partners levels. By talking about it you can prevent hurt feelings.

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