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Arguing About Baby Names

How to Choose a Baby Name without Fighting

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Updated May 26, 2010

Baby names are personal - are you arguing over baby names?

Baby names are personal - are you arguing over baby names?

Photo © iStockPhoto

Situation One: It's a huge family gathering and you've just announced the good news - you're expecting a baby! Amid the congratulations, your sister takes you aside and says, "Just remember, you can't use Hannah - it's my name for a baby girl..."

You're probably speechless over this announcement. So what do you do? Do you spitefully announce that Hannah is at the top of your list? Or do you tell your husband that you can't use that name and move on?

Situation Two: Your husband loves the name Benjamin. You think it's okay but what you really don't want to admit is that it's the name of an old boyfriend.

You can come clean and admit the real reason you don't want to use Benjamin. You can use the name and pray that you don't cringe every time you say the name. Or you can just veto the name and move on...

Situation Three: It's the ninth month and you're hopelessly deadlocked. You have a long list of names and your husband refuses to pick one. In fact, he won't even talk about it.

You can just ignore the situation and resolve to fill out the paperwork at the hospital when you're alone. You can take a laid back approach and figure you will eventually find a name. Or you can have a show down and force a name selection.

Problems with naming babies is not a new one. Every family has beliefs about naming babies. Every religion or culture has ideas of how the process should go. And simply put, two people are likely to have two opinions on this very important manner.

  • Make lists. Girls. Boys. Family names. Names you like. Names you don't. Come up with a solution for narrowing the list down together. Ask your husband if he has a list to give you as well. Offer five free cross offs with no questions - but remember, the red pen goes both ways.

  • Consider a secret. The easiest way to avoid a family feud over a name is to hold the answer hostage until after your baby is born. It means that no one can say if they like or dislike the name. It also leaves no room for squabbling over who got what name first.

Readers Respond: What advice do you have for baby naming and sharing the names?

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