At some point I moved to the bed and still did hands and knees. My large tee shirt came off, so I was just in my jog bra. Taking off that tee shirt was a big commitment for me, and I heard murmurs of approval and understanding in the room.
People were arriving but I wasn't very aware of them, except as individuals. We had a ton of people, about eleven including me. However, I only noticed those who I needed. I saw my sister come in with her baby, and I reached out my hand and started crying, "I'm so happy you're here!" Kevin was wiping my forehead with a cold rag, and I smiled at him and said, "I guess we're going to bed with our baby tonight."
My friend, and doula Eve arrived. I didn't see her at first but she came up and touched my leg. She has such a gentle touch and I knew it was her. She had been away that evening so I was worried that she would miss the birth. I felt very relieved that she was there. She really kept the lid on everything and remembered a lot of things that were important to me that others had forgotten. I have Eve to thank for a lot of wonderful memories that might not have happened.
The kids came in. Benjamin ran up to me at the foot of the bed, put a stool up and grabbed my leg, "Did you have the baby yet, momma?" I shook my head and told him to sit at the top of the bed with Hilary. Later I found out he hit Eve up for some Halloween candy first. Hilary sat wide eyed, while Benjamin kept offering me toys, and asking if it hurt. Watching the video I was very calm, and I just responded with, "I love you, Benjamin." It was so great to have them there, especially now to watch them talk about it.
Mary Ann said that I could push if I wanted to, I didn't feel a great need, but I only had a lip of cervix left. I pushed a few times and it neither made it better nor worse, so I just didn't do it. Eve brought me a hot rice sock for my back, and Kevin was sitting next to me almost holding me and rubbing my arms. A few minutes later, and I felt a large pop and my water had broken.
It was nice and clear. My family had been worried that because I was overdue there would be meconium (first bowel movement) in the water. Mary Ann listened to the baby to ensure that the change had been tolerated. Everything was perfect. She checked me again and said that I was really complete.
It seemed that I was still very far from the birth in my mind. However, the next thing I know Mary Ann is asking Kevin to come down next to her. I couldn't see what was going on, and I wasn't feeling anything too intense, so I was sure I wasn't close to giving birth. Kevin's eyes told me a different story.
He touched his child for the first time and his eyes just lit up. He looked so excited. I pushed again, and Mary Ann said, "The head is born." Kevin was staring in amazement. It seemed like a long time to me, but it was really a matter of a few seconds, and Kevin placed a warm, wiggly body on my belly. We were both crying. I felt so great!
I heard Hilary say, "It's Isaac!" Kevin came around to me with his hands still on the baby and was kissing my face all over. We were crying all over each other and didn't care. It was so special.
All said and done, I labored for about five hours. I've often told my clients that short labors are harder, now I will attest to it from a personal point of view.
Isaac weighed nearly nine pounds and was born with his arm up on his head. I had a few small skid marks, but nothing that required stitching. The placenta was huge and felt good to get that out. The kids loved on the baby and the others cooed over him as well. Then Kevin and I were left alone with him.
The baby cried until Kevin took off his shirt and held him skin to skin, and we had forgotten that the video camera was on so we have some special private moments on tape, including me taking off my jog bra to feed the little one!
However, what was really special was the sight of Kevin and I sitting there holding our precious miracle. We are crying and crying, happiness, joy, sorrow... too many emotions to count. It had been a long journey to this point, and many times along the way we weren't sure we'd ever make it. We fought ourselves, each other and everyone else. So, to have finally finished and to be holding our prize felt very good.
Isaac was named for the Biblical Isaac. Isaac's mother, Sarah had tried for years to get pregnant and couldn't, when she finally did she was 90 years old. And she is said to have laughed, so she named her son Isaac, which means to laugh. We have many days of laughter ahead of us.
