My only complaint is that I felt unprepared for the pain. I felt that if I did the things I was taught, I wouldn't have any pain, that it didn't *have* to be painful. Some honesty would have left me more prepared! Although going directly going into hard labor due to my starting at 5 centimeters and dialating fully within 2 1/2 hours must have contributed to the intensity of the pain. The good news was it went fast, though it seemed like an ETERNITY (in hell!).. Though after the first hour I was at 5-6 centimeters still and I thought oh no I can't any more of this it isn't even accomplishing anything!!!
Well... when the pain was absoltuely UNbearable, they all got me in a hot bath with bubbles and lavendar and they started pouring water over my belly during each ctrx. It went like this for quite a while. This was the worst part of my labor. The water helped at first though. It had lavender and herbs and bubbles and a heating pad for my back and lots of nice stuff. They talked to me about love and nice things to help calm me. They are truly miracle workers. When I begged for drugs, they would say no, which I know is hard when you see someone in so much pain. Jeff did really well too, I would have been scared and given him the drugs myself if I were in his shoes, but I think he really trusted the women there so he was ok, though he was crying a lot for me at the end!! So around 10, my back started killing me. They were afraid baby went posterior, so I got on the bed on all fours to turn her. After that it never happened again (getting on all fours musta worked!). I think something weird was sticking in my back, like a leg or something maybe. Anyways, after that one contraction I got on my side for her to do an internal, and she said "well that's why your pain was so intense -- your at 9 centimeters!!" So that time in the tub really helped.
At that point I started to grunt/want to push some. She said go right ahead you can push that cervical lip away I bet... Well I did and then it really HURT LIKE hell and I got even more scared and I said.."I can't do this for 2 hours", like matter-of-factly. I just plain wanted them to know I *refused* lol!! I knew the average pushing time for first babies was 2 hours so I was NOT going to handle that -- I couldn't. Well, she said you don't have to! Your baby is UNUSUALLY (LUCKILY!) LOW, you are going to push 20 MINUTES!! Inside I was like, wow--I can do that, MAYBE!! But totally relieved, because I knew I wasn't capable of anything more. I guess God gives us only as much as we can handle. So I pushed and pushed, and it was totally animal. I don't know how women don't push by doctor's (or midwives) orders, because I COULD NOT STOP. I also couldn't push when told to unless I had this animal urge that took over with the ctrxs. So it was like totally by my urging. And sometimes they would want me to continue, but I just ignored them cuz I couldn't! It was painful, as bad as the contraction that were killing me, but I kept remembering (I don't know how but I did) in "The Girlfriend's Guide To Pregnancy" how she said the only thing you can do is PUSH THROUGH the pain.
